Mancentration

Dave and I have been married for over six years and together for close to a decade and there is still one thing I haven’t learned – that he cannot multitask. If he is reading something – a book, a magazine, the internet – he cannot focus on anything else.

That’s right, he suffers from Mancentration.

What is mancentration you might ask? Firstly, do not confuse it with menstruation. Menstruation is something that only women go through and mancentration is something that only men suffer from. (Medical definitions up in here like WHOA.)

Does Your Guy Suffer from Mancentration? | Perks of Being a JAP | www.perksofbeingajap.com

Mancentration (n) is defined as the disease that affects men making them incapable of focusing on more than one thing at a time.

I used to (and to be honest still do) just start talking to Dave without getting his attention. I could be five minutes deep into talking about something only to have him look up blankly and go, “I’m sorry, what?” BECAUSE HE DIDN’T HEAR A THING. And it’s not that he was ignoring me. He simply cannot focus on more than one thing at a time.

Reading isn’t the only part of Dave’s focus that is affected by mancentration. Talking on the phone has also fallen to the perils of this horrible disease. Case in point – the other day he was on the phone with a friend and Sadie was in front of him saying and then yelling his name to try and get his attention. Something like…

Dad. Daddy. Daddy. DADDY. DADDY. DAD. DADDDDY. DAAAAAAAAAADDDDYYY. Etc.

family-guy-mom

I finally went out to see whatever it was she needed.

The way Dave explained it to me is that he is so used to being focused in the classroom and tuning out the noise and sounds around him that it just happens now with other things he is doing.

To be fair by now I should realize this and adjust my communication accordingly but I forget and want to talk to him like a NORMAL PERSON. And Sadie, well Sadie is four so she doesn’t know any better.

(Dave I love you and this is (mostly) in jest.) MUAH.

Do you have a guy that suffers from mancentration in your life? 

Comments

  1. Oh god, this is my boyfriend John in a nutshell! Great post!
    Erin recently posted…July 2016: Polish FavouritesMy Profile

  2. Haha!

    Yep. Incapable of multi-tasking/having a conversation and doing ANYTHING else. Sigh. Good thing they’re cute.

    xox
    Feisty Harriet recently posted…Arizona Meteor CraterMy Profile

  3. Lol this is hilarious! My husband is the same way. It’s so frustrating!

  4. Dave,
    Don’t take this shit lying down! DAVE…..DAVE…..DAVE ROSE! Oh never mind.

  5. Yeah, Ryan is incapable of walking and talking simultaneously. We’ll be talking in the car, get to the grocery store, and he gets grumpy if I tell him “ok, we can get out of the car and go into the store while you finish your story” 😉
    He says you ought to write a paper on the theory, he thinks you’ve really got something!

  6. My husband is SO guilty of this! He gets extremely distracted especially when it comes driving. He will see things and gets distracted usually resulting in me driving because I’m always afraid we will get into an accident.

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