What the Google?

I love checking out what people Google to get to my blog. I can’t be the only blogger that does this, right? RIGHT? Well I compiled some of my favorites from the last few weeks for your enjoyment:

“quit facebook right thing to do” – It’s right, it’s wrong, WHO CARES! Stop talking about it and just do it!

“biggest cheque ever written” – While I said that our deposit check for our house was the biggest check I’ve ever written, I’m sure there are bigger ones out there. (TWSS?)

“hot girl nyc subway” – Yes, you found me! 8 months pregnant and all!! Oh did you mean some other girl? Maybe you should check out the Missed Connections on Craigslist to find who you were looking for.

“shave before pedicure” – Is it wrong that now going to the doctor for my pregnancy check ups, I don’t care about shaving, but I still make sure to shave a day in advance to get a pedicure? I feel like the Asian ladies at my nail salon will be more judgmental of me than my doctor. 🙁  Also, the comments on this post are hilarious.

“how to make a golden snitch ferrero rocher candy” Add wings to it? I know Arielle made our Ferrero Rocher chocolates into legitimate Golden Snitches by flinging them across the room whenever they were playing Quidditch in the movies, during our last HarryPotterFestaThon. Works for me!

“cable car cigars” Yes, when you and your husband are on a tour in the Dominican Republic that includes a cigar rolling shop, and you’re the only people who enjoy cigars.  Special attention from the store owner?  Yes please! And Dave rolled his own cigar, so there you go.

“cheap cute bras” Not for preggos!  Sure there are ones at Target, but comfort is key for me right now, and none of the ones I tried (awhile ago) were comfy! When I’m not pregnant, I swear by American Eagle bras! Cute and cheap!

“never have I ever list” I’m pretty sure you were looking for something a little more risque, like the game we played at summer camp, but sorry to say this post wasn’t it. Also the fact that we were like, 13-15 and playing Never Have I Ever is pretty hilarious in itself. What were we doing??

“leatherface” AHHH THE FACIAL! What an experience. I’m going for a prenatal massage in two weeks and I’m keeping my fingers crossed that there will be no plastic gloves!! (I know there wont because the spa is awesome, but still.)

“american eagle jeans rip” or “american eagle jeans ripping” I’ve gotten a TON of search hits from this.  And also about American Eagle having a lifetime warrantee on jeans.  Sorry people – they don’t.  Someone who works at AE even recently commented on that post confirming!  So don’t be a fat-ass like me and try to wiggle into a pair of non-stretch jeans while wearing leggings underneath!

“generator” I don’t even know. Are you looking for one? Did I mention one?  WHAT KIND OF GENERATOR?

“‘my doctor told me to stay away from balls’ ‘well there goes your'” BWAH HA HA HA HA.  I figured out that I mentioned that classic Clueless exchange in this post. Oh dodgeball, I miss you.  But Dave doesn’t miss Arielle‘s and my trash talking, I’ll bet you that!

“punch buggies real name” It’s totally Punch Buggy, not Slug Bug.  You weird Midwesterners.  Also if Dave and I were keeping score, it would be something like:

Lacey: eleventy-billion
Dave: 12  😉

“Pregnancy Pillow” Yes, GO GET ONE.  Except not the ridiculously giant one that’s basically a bed in itself.  And then tune out your husband when he complains about the size of yours.

social network friends in jappy” WTF? Is Jappy a town?  (Apparently no, I just Googled “Jappy USA” and nothing came up.)  WHAT DOES THIS MEAN?

What’s the weirdest or most random Google search term to ever hit your blog? 

 

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Comments

  1. I think checking out ridiculous searches may just be my favorite part of being a blogger (maybe).

  2. My blog isn’t Google-able which means I don’t get to have fun looking at the weird shit people search for that leads them to my blog. Maybe one day I’ll stop blocking search on it. Probably not while I’m looking for a new job though. Hahah.

  3. cute!!!

  4. These are hilarious! I want to see how people get to my blog how do I check that?

  5. My biggest hit is still a blog post I wrote FOUR YEARS AGO about meeting a porn star at my birthday dinner. Not exactly the traffic I want.

    Also… SLUG BUG.

  6. I love looking at those stats too! Especially since the posts that get the most hits would never be what you’d expect.

  7. I’ve had some weird and wonderful ones in my time, but I had one that wasn’t THAT weird but more disturbing last night. I discovered through statcounter that someone had found my blog by doing a google image search on Glasgow whores. I discovered not one, but TWO pics of me from my blog on the first page. Now THAT was upsetting! Not quite sure how it happened or what to do about it, and maybe i would just rather not have known!

    • Whaaaaaaaaaaaaat? So bizarre!!! I remember when I started blogging there was some dude who ran a “hot blogger” site, and rated female bloggers… I didn’t know if I should be happy I wasn’t on there, or upset I wasn’t! Haha. But yeah that website you found yourself on… no good!

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