You know what really grinds my gears?

I hate it when the people at Dunkin Donuts don’t cut the bagel. They cut it in half, spread cream cheese on it, put the two halves together, and then you’re supposed to CUT THE BAGEL IN HALF AGAIN. SO I HAVE TWO HALVES OF A BAGEL. I have a small mouth. I have small hands. I don’t want to be gnawing at the whole bagel at my desk in the morning. And I don’t enjoy ripping it in half after you’ve forgotten to cut it. So please Dunkin Donuts people, cut the bagel!!!

People on the train – gravity doesn’t all of a sudden disappear when you are holding on to the pole. There is no reson that your hand should be continually slipping so that it touches mine every 2 minutes. I’m not a germaphobe, but I don’t want to touch you. The fact that I have to move my hand every time yours touches mine, should give you a hint that you need a firmer grip on the pole. (Haha that sounds dirty.) And if your hands are slipping because you’re sweating too much, I suggest you get that looked at.

Lady at Cafe Metro – when I say I only want a little bit of pepper flakes in my udon, please don’t throw a heaping tablespoon in there. Because when I was eating it and it splashed? In my eye? It effin’ burned. I blame you.

The toilet in my apartment. Our landlord is in the process of fixing it, but bought the wrong pump for the tank so right now the tank has no lid and the pump sticks a good few inches above it. And it makes an awful gurgling noise like the toilet monster is going to come out and eat me. (Remember that scene in Look Who’s Talking? Where the kid was afraid of the toilet and they had that dream scene where it was going to eat him or something? Haha.) The landlord needs to come over and fix that shizz asap. I hate having to keep the bathroom door closed when we’re not using it because then when I open the door to go inside, it’s freezing in there!! I do not like!

Weekends – could you not go by so quickly and make me feel like I got no rest at all? I’m happy to be busy and have a lot of things to do/people to see, but if you could at least just fool me and make me feel well rested, that would be awesome.

Oh let’s not forget to mention people who forget how to walk. Be aware of your surroundings. If you’re in the subway and there is a train coming, forget that you aren’t waiting for that train. People behind you may want to get their ass home, and you taking a leisurely jaunt down the stairs to the platform is hindering their (MY) way. Move to the side! Walk faster! Do something!! And this isn’t limited to subways, people on the streets are guilty too! I mainly blame tourists, because they’re not used to the fast paced groove of NYC, but do NOT, under ANY circumstances, come to a dead stop in the middle of the sidewalk, to look at your map/talk on your phone/take a picture of an unimportant building that you think is important for some ungodly reason/etc. MOVE TO THE SIDE! You’re in MY way, and I will kick you in the shins if you don’t move. (Note – I haven’t kicked anyone in the shins yet that’s gotten in my way, but I may… soon.)

I think those are all my gripes for now. Anything you’re griping about today??

Comments

  1. A Margarita says

    People who just STOP in the middle of the sidewalk drive me insane.

    My pet peeve of the day? Wednesdays are completely unnecessary.

  2. What’s funny is that it annoys me when they DO cut the bagel in half again. ๐Ÿ™‚ Weird.

  3. Traci Anne says

    Always the subway. Always. Also, people who can’t figure out how to walk here. It’s just like driving! Would you just randomly stop in the middle of the highway to take a picture? No? Then get the fuck outta my way.

    And now I want a bagel.

  4. Making my way in PA says

    Can we just mention the quanity of cream cheese on the bagels? PLEASE PUT IT ON THE SIDE – doesn’t seem to register. And really I don’t need as much cream cheese as bagel.

  5. people that drive below the speed limit when there is no traffic….seriously people, get with it.

  6. Ugh, the hand-slipping-on-the-subway thing really, really bothers me… That and people who full-on lean against the pole – while you are holding it! I do NOT want my hand trapped between the pole and your back, thankyouverymuch

  7. nicoleantoinette says

    1. I miss NY bagels
    2. I like to eat one complete side and then one complete other side, not like them staked on top of each other and cut.
    3. No one cares, haha I know but I thought I’d share.

  8. Peter Mc says

    My pet peeve is when someone asks me for my advice, I give said advice, then two weeks later they come back to me sayin “so-and-so” told them to do “this and that” and it is, verbatim, the excact advice I gave them two weeks ealier!!! Why does no one listen to me?!?! You’re not listening now are??? Nooo!!!!!!!!!!! Ha! x

  9. When people put their bag on an entire seat on the bus, so no one can sit there, while there are a SHIT TON of people standing. Definitely grinds my gears. I alway think to myself “oh, your bag is so privileged it deserves a seat?” and am SO tempted to say it out loud, but I’m me so I don’t. damn it.

  10. I hate 75% of NYC walkers, particularly tourists. DO NOT STOP SHORT TO CONSULT YOUR MAP, POINT OUT SOMETHING TO YOUR FRIEND OR TALK ON YOUR CELL PHONE. Keep the traffic moving, folks.

  11. The Flash says

    I don’t, ah, mean to be unsympathetic, but, uh, you’re, like, a Jew in New York… why are you buying a bagel at dunkin donuts?

*

CommentLuv badge